This is an optional service and is a choice to be made by the family. The vigil service is the natural time for the expression of our sorrow. This service is geared toward providing support, consolation, and sympathy to the family and friends of the departed Christian. The Vigil service takes place during an arranged time of visitation, either at the funeral home, family home or even at the Church. A time for visitation allows time to retell and rejoice in the memory of the one who has died. Recalling favorite stories can be life giving for family and friends.

The Rosary was the traditional prayer of the Catholic wake service prior to Vatican II. Though the rosary is soothing to some people, it may not allow for the participation of non-Catholics to pray together with those who are gathered to remember the deceased. The liturgical revisions of the Church ask that a Vigil service (usually based on a Liturgy of the Word) be kept as the main prayer component when keeping watch with a family.

Here is an example of a timeline for a visitation at a funeral home, allowing for a variety of prayer:

5:30pm
Private visitation for family only begins

6:00pm
Visitation open to the public begins
(this can be with or without a viewing of the body or with cremated remains)

7:00pm
Vigil Service, led by a deacon, priest, a family member or lay minister

7:30pm – 8pm 
Time can be offered for prepared eulogies and/or open to anyone who wishes to share their memories of the deceased with others

8:00pm
The evening can formally close with a Rosary for those who wish to stay and pray, ideally led by a family member or friend

Families should prepare to meet with clergy or parish staff to prepare the Funeral Mass or Service as well as the Vigil service (if chosen). You will discuss options regarding the readings, music and other prayers for the service.

Here are some things to keep in mind:

• A Funeral Mass always has either the body or cremated remains of the deceased present. If cremation is chosen, the Funeral Mass may be celebrated before the body is cremated and the Rite of Committal celebrated once the cremation takes place. The Funeral Mass may also be celebrated after cremation takes place, with the cremated remains present, immediately followed by the Rite of Committal.
• If the Funeral is celebrated at the funeral home or at a cemetery chapel, the Mass is not celebrated.
• Even at the Church, a Funeral Mass may not be celebrated during the Easter Triduum (Holy Thursday through Easter Sunday), on Solemnities and on Sundays. On these days, a Funeral service is the only option.

This rite is often called a “graveside service” and takes place at the cemetery. It usually immediately follows the Funeral Mass or Service, though at times this is not possible. The service can be led by clergy, a lay minister or family member with a simple order of service provided by the Church. 

• Amazing Grace
• Be Not Afraid (B. Dufford)
• How Great Thou Art
• Make Me A Channel of Your Peace / Prayer of St. Francis (S. Temple)
• On Eagle's Wings (M. Joncas)
• Eye Has Not Seen (M. Haugen)
• Sing With All the Saints in Glory
• I Have Loved You (M. Joncas)
• All is Well with My Soul (C. Landry)
• I Know that My Redeemer Lives (S. Soper)

• Gift of Finest Wheat (O. Westendorf)
• I Am the Bread of Life (S. Toolan)
• One Bread, One Body (J. Foley)
• Taste and See (J. Moore)
• Behold the Lamb (M. Willett)
• Worthy is the Lamb (R. Manalo)

• Panis Angelicus (C. Franck)
• Ave Maria (Schubert or Back-Gounod)
• Pie Jesu (Faure or Webber)
• Shelter Me (M. Joncas)

• Like a Shepherd (B. Dufford)
• Shelter Me O God (B. Hurd)
• Soon and Very Soon (A. Crouch)
• The Summons (J. Bell)
• Shepherd Me, O God (M. Haugen)
• Let There Be Peace on Earth
• Here I Am, Lord (D. Schutte)
• Only in God (J. Foley)
• You Are Near (D. Schutte)
• The Cloud's Veil (L. Lawton)
• God, Our Source and Life, Unite Us (T. Thompson)
• Be Thou My Vision
• Come to the Water (J. Foley)
• Shall We Gather at the River
• Jerusalem, My Happy Home

1. In baptism __________ received the light of Christ. Scatter the darkness now and lead him/her over the waters of death.

   We pray to the Lord. R/. Lord, hear our prayer

2. Many friends and members of our families have gone before us and await your kingdom. Grant them an everlasting home with your Son.

3. Today many are dying by violence, war, famine, disease, and natural disasters. Show your mercy to those who suffer, and gather them into your eternal kingdom of peace.

4. For those who mourn, especially the family and friends of __________ . Grant them comfort and consolation. Heal their pain and dispel the darkness and doubt that come from grief.

5. For those who are serving in the armed forces, we thank you for protecting our freedom and pray that you return safely to your loved ones.

6. Lord Jesus, gentle Shepherd, who brings rest to our souls, give peace to __________ forever.

7. For __________ , who in baptism was given the pledge of eternal life, that he/she may now be admitted to the company of the saints.

8. For our brother/sister who ate the body of Christ, the bread of life, that he/she may be raised up on the last day.

9. For our deceased relatives and friends and for all who have helped us, that they may have reward of their goodness.

10. For the family and friends of our brother/sister __________ that they may be consoled in their grief by the Lord, who wept at the death of his friend Lazarus.

11. For all of us assembled here to worship in faith, that we may be gathered together again in God’s kingdom.

If you choose to have a Catholic funeral one of the first decisions to be considered is whether to opt for a burial or a cremation. Both are acceptable in the Catholic faith.

You have the options of cremating your loved one either before or after the Funeral.

• If you cremate their body after the Funeral, the body will be present for the Funeral and the Funeral can take place sooner.  After the Funeral, the body is taken to the crematorium.  Once the body is cremated then the burial can take place.
• If you cremate their body before the Funeral, then the ashes will be present for the Funeral.  Determining the date for the Funeral will be dependent on the cremation process and timeline. After the Funeral, the ashes can be immediately taken for burial.
   

• A Catholic funeral Mass usually lasts an hour.
• A Catholic funeral service (not Mass) takes around 40 minutes.
• A Catholic funeral service at the cemetery or crematorium usually takes about 20 minutes.

No, Mass is optional at a church funeral and should be celebrated if the people gathered understand and will participate in the Eucharist.

Note: A funeral Mass is not allowed at the cemetery or crematorium.  If the funeral is celebrated outside the Church, it will be a service (without communion).

• Catholic funerals can take place at any time. 
• The timing is often restricted by availability of the church, funeral home, cemetery or crematorium.

Catholic funerals may be celebrated on any day except:

• Holy days of obligation
• Holy Thursday
• Good Friday
• Holy Saturday
• Easter Sunday
• Sundays of Advent, Lent, and Easter

The Catholic Church allows funerals on Sunday but in practice, but they would typically take place at a Funeral home or cemetery, which are not usually available for funerals on Sunday.

If you aren’t sure, formal attire is best. There is no requirement to wear black.

If you receive no instructions, check with the family. They may ask only family to bring flowers and ask others to make a donation to a designated charity.

In most cases, children should be encouraged to go to funerals. Attending funerals helps them to understand that death is a natural part of life.

At St. Bernadette, a relative or friend of the deceased is welcome to share a eulogy, read a poem or share their memories of the person who has died.  This takes place before the Mass or service begins.  Note that some sharing and stories can be offered at the reception after the funeral, if there is one.

All music selections must be approved by the Director of Worship.  In general, non-religious music is played at the gravesite or the reception after the funeral.

A favorite poem could be include words spoken in memory of the person. Alternatively, it could be printed in the funeral worship aid or read at the reception afterwards.